It was crazy, my night.....

Fezzaunt 'ere! It was crazy, my night. Balloons and banners decked the halls of Fezzaunt Towers on Friday night as the Fezzaunt celebrated it's birthday with 4 very close friends. Obviously Old El Paso fahitas featured heavily in a tingy tango jamaican sauce with the obligatory gummel (how do pronounce that word please?). One of the guests had to cook the dinner as a pneumatic nail shop owner fell asleep upstairs. Although he doesn't normally do packets, it was a success. The refried beans went straight in the bin, untouched; nobody wanted them, they just looked stupid.

Hats off to the gummel, although it was a bit chunky; I were feared of chippin' a tooth.

Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday dear Fezzaunt!
Happy birthday to you!

Fezzaunt

I were feared of chippin' a tooth!

Fezzaunt 'ere! A very big welcome to our overseas followers (you know who you are!)

We need more followers on the blog to keep it going so tell all your Preston-loving friends to get on 'ere and start commenting!

This site isn't just for the young and the sexy an' all that, it's for all ages, shapes and sizes. Why, Bernard himself is said to have had a view once or twice.

If I don't keep this blog based on the fact that Preston is my heart and my passion.....

Fezzaunt :o)

Strictly Come Poledancing With Me

Hello Darlings! Fezzaunt 'ere! I can't even remember how much I paid for them now.....

Having watched all the episodes again whilst quaffing wine and laughing hysterically, I suddenly wondered what life must be like for our famous 5 since the first airing? Do you think Valerie has had to put the house on the market because of constant media attention? Has Nigel gone back to his showbiz life in the sun? Is Bernard overworked with requests for pineapple doormats and did Dawn's poledancing skills help her when she wrapped her car around a pole?

Ponder.

Fezzaunt

Reg's Fezzaunts

Here's the actual place where are lovely Val famously purchased her fezzaunts...

I'm off to Gran Canaria (before I snuff it).....

Fezzaunt 'ere! It's been a busy week what with me trying to recreate the entire Preston menu. If anyone wants to donate scallop shells, email me; I bought some from the fishmonger, can't remember how much I paid for them now, but I've put them in the dishwasher too many times and there's nothing left of them.

Bernard's coming to lay the carpets this weekend. I'm having pineapples right up the hallway. He tells me it will be like an opera, like a ballet, like a symphony! As you can imagine, I'm more than a little excited.

I hope they like pineapples, eh? I like pineapples!

Fezzaunt

"Minor YouTube celebutante who came third in a minor reality show" Wikipedia SHOCKER!

The Fezzaunt is SHOCKED to hear that some idiot has asked Wikipedia to remove Valerie Holliday from their website because she is a "Minor YouTube celebutante who came third in a minor reality show"! Valerie fans MUST make a stand and do something about this. Get onto Wikipedia and stop this debacle! C4 have already taken Valerie Holliday the Movie off YouTube and now this!

The Fezzaunt isn't pleased.

Dawn! Yer 'air's in yer avocaaaaaado!

Have a look at this piece of sheer utter genius!