Saturday, 28 November 2009

I can't see that any of us ull be goin'

Ole! Fezzaunt 'ere!

The search for Valerie in Lanzarote draws to a fruitless close.... she's not 'ere.

After much deliberating, the Fezzaunt feels it's time to take THAT trip up the M6 to the Tickled Trout, taking a left and searching for the famous 5 in their home town. Of course, Valerie lovers, we'll keep you informed about when this pilgrimage will take place and many photos will be posted.

It's now time to fly North for the Winter!

Beunos noches.

Fezzaunt :-)


Monday, 23 November 2009

The search for Valerie: UPDATE

Ola! Fezzaunt 'ere! My search for Val has lead me to Lanzarote; the nothern island in the Canaries. Now donning a wristband, hoping for a white mark a la val, we're sure we're close to finding her.

She's definitely been 'ere!

Fezzaunt :-)

Friday, 20 November 2009

Y Viva E'Fezzaunt!

Ola! Fezzaunt 'ere!

As it's shooting season, the Fezzaunt has decided to take a break next week and leave the country but fear not Valerie lovers, the Fezzaunt will be back the week after next with more tales of our 5 Famous Prestonites.

Im off to the Canary Islands (Yes, If I see her, I'll take a pic and post it!).

Beunos Dias

Fezzaunt :o)

Monday, 16 November 2009

It was crazy, my night.....

Fezzaunt 'ere! It was crazy, my night. Balloons and banners decked the halls of Fezzaunt Towers on Friday night as the Fezzaunt celebrated it's birthday with 4 very close friends. Obviously Old El Paso fahitas featured heavily in a tingy tango jamaican sauce with the obligatory gummel (how do pronounce that word please?). One of the guests had to cook the dinner as a pneumatic nail shop owner fell asleep upstairs. Although he doesn't normally do packets, it was a success. The refried beans went straight in the bin, untouched; nobody wanted them, they just looked stupid.

Hats off to the gummel, although it was a bit chunky; I were feared of chippin' a tooth.

Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday dear Fezzaunt!
Happy birthday to you!


Thursday, 12 November 2009

I were feared of chippin' a tooth!

Fezzaunt 'ere! A very big welcome to our overseas followers (you know who you are!)

We need more followers on the blog to keep it going so tell all your Preston-loving friends to get on 'ere and start commenting!

This site isn't just for the young and the sexy an' all that, it's for all ages, shapes and sizes. Why, Bernard himself is said to have had a view once or twice.

If I don't keep this blog based on the fact that Preston is my heart and my passion.....

Fezzaunt :o)

Wednesday, 11 November 2009

Strictly Come Poledancing With Me

Hello Darlings! Fezzaunt 'ere! I can't even remember how much I paid for them now.....

Having watched all the episodes again whilst quaffing wine and laughing hysterically, I suddenly wondered what life must be like for our famous 5 since the first airing? Do you think Valerie has had to put the house on the market because of constant media attention? Has Nigel gone back to his showbiz life in the sun? Is Bernard overworked with requests for pineapple doormats and did Dawn's poledancing skills help her when she wrapped her car around a pole?



Friday, 6 November 2009

Reg's Fezzaunts

Here's the actual place where are lovely Val famously purchased her fezzaunts...

I'm off to Gran Canaria (before I snuff it).....

Fezzaunt 'ere! It's been a busy week what with me trying to recreate the entire Preston menu. If anyone wants to donate scallop shells, email me; I bought some from the fishmonger, can't remember how much I paid for them now, but I've put them in the dishwasher too many times and there's nothing left of them.

Bernard's coming to lay the carpets this weekend. I'm having pineapples right up the hallway. He tells me it will be like an opera, like a ballet, like a symphony! As you can imagine, I'm more than a little excited.

I hope they like pineapples, eh? I like pineapples!


Wednesday, 4 November 2009

"Minor YouTube celebutante who came third in a minor reality show" Wikipedia SHOCKER!

The Fezzaunt is SHOCKED to hear that some idiot has asked Wikipedia to remove Valerie Holliday from their website because she is a "Minor YouTube celebutante who came third in a minor reality show"! Valerie fans MUST make a stand and do something about this. Get onto Wikipedia and stop this debacle! C4 have already taken Valerie Holliday the Movie off YouTube and now this!

The Fezzaunt isn't pleased.

Dawn! Yer 'air's in yer avocaaaaaado!

Have a look at this piece of sheer utter genius!

Monday, 2 November 2009

Washed up old shells.....

Hello Fezzaunt lovers... Fezzaunt 'ere! I've never timed anything in my life!

Had a lovely weekend in Preston with the gang. Nigel cooked us a beautiful meal which we ate in a tent in his garden. After that it was over to Bernie's Tropical Island Bar which was open until late. Finally, all back to Paul's for some poledancing; obviously Valerie wouldn't take part. She said it was just for the young and the sexy an' all that!